Day 1

They got back to Melbourne today.

It's been a pretty emotional day for everyone I guess. I've noticed what people mean when they say what looks like only a little progress, it is and feels like a lot. He cried around three times. First was when he arrived home. Second was while he just laid down to rest, and third after I had helped him with some of his physio exercises. I just stayed silent and hugged him when he cried. I teared up, but wouldn't let him see my fears. When he cries, I want to tell him "What's there to cry about?" Not in a mean, insensitive way, but in a joking ignorance to help him not think about it. But then again, when it happens, I freeze up and I get tongue tied, seeing someone who I've regarded as a manly man breaking down before my eyes.

It was all worth it for the laughs that I got out of him. One was when he got me to check whether he could be my supervising driver now that he's an "invalid". I don't like that word. I feel that it's somewhat degrading. I flipped through the book and said, quite indifferent towards the law, "Nuh, doesn't seem to have any rules against it." and chucked the book to the side. That got him laughing, and that was definitely worth it. The second time was when I made a joke about her desire to study taxation for the sake of "cheating the system". That got him chuckling.

Apart from the emotional periods, he is very positive. Which is good, I think. It keeps everyone positive. She cries everytime she sees him cry. And it all becomes one massive waterworks. Not really, but you get the picture.

While I was helping him with his exercises, I found it hard to understand him sometimes, possibly because of his slur, but I think that it was mainly 'cause he spoke it disjointed phrases, rather than completed sentences. Eventually I got the hang of it, and now I'm understanding him better. A highlight of this is when he says "SPAM!!", and I responded with a "huh?" and he starts working his right hand with his left and says "MUSCLE SPAM!" and then I realized he means muscle spasm. So now whenever he says "spam", I know he wants me to stretch his muscles and massage it.

He seems determined. After he gets emotional, he seems to have even more determination to get better. I see it in his body, his face and his eyes. When he tries to "simply" wave, I see his whole body tense, his face contorts in strain and determination. His eyes start leaking at this point.

In reflection of all of this, I've decided to get healthy. I'm taking this crap which my big bro is taking that is supposed to be for high cholesterol. It's a fiber supplement. I'm also eating somewhat healthy.

I cooked lunch and dinner today. Simple variants of soup noodles. Just changing the soup. It's gonna take me some time to get used to eating bland food. Almost no salt is killing me. I enjoy the cooking through. It is a challenge and an opportunity to learn to make great tasting dishes that are also healthy and can accommodate for him.

Today was Day 1.