"God's love does not discriminate...

So why should ours?"

I've been thinking about that for the whole week... I don't know, but it just keeps coming back to me. Today at CYR we were talking about how people see God in us, and Eugene brought up a point about love... or something on living by example. I really can't remember all that well, but I related it to the whole statement "God's love doesn't discriminate, so why should mine?" (slight variation) What does it matter who they are, what they believe in, their opinions, thoughts, mindsets, their race, culture, gender, age... what does any of it matter? They are all God's children as well... I've been reflecting on that, and I think that I don't love enough... Hmm. Although I say that, I think I'm a somewhat "loving"/accepting person... Some people would know why I would be, and for that very reason I should be even MORE accepting. But I still find myself with petty little biases and stuff. I loathe it. I detest it. I hate it with a passion. It's so hypocritical.

On another note, I've been pretty tired and then annoyed this past day. It was a busy day with CYR in the morning, Kim and Jason's wedding in the arvo (the church was done up so beautifully, and the wedding was gorgeous), LinC in the late arvo/early evening and dinner at Aunty Mary's at night(Aunty Mary's sweet and sour pork > life).

In between wedding and LinC, I took a nap! Your response should be "WOW, JOHN TOOK A NAP?!" Yes, THAT'S how tired I am/was. I took an hour nap to be woken up by my vibrating phone, when my mom called me to tell me to find a ride to LinC. But yeah, I quickly called my brother, dad and then Wes to get a ride. Haha....

Compounded with how tired I was, I got pretty annoyed at my dad when I was driving to Aunty Mary's. I don't know, he was picking up on the littlest things about my driving, and I think it was 'cause I was so tired that I got annoyed. In the end, I just said "Yes" and "Okay", because I knew that I was tired, too tired to argue, and that I was gonna just get more worked up and I was too tired for that... So when I got to Aunty Mary's I just talked to my mom for a bit about it... I think I prefer driving with my mom than my dad, 'cause she trusts me more. Before today, it would've been the other way around...

On the drive back from Aunty Mary's (I wasn't driving, because both my parents didn't trust me, and for good reason.) I was just singing/humming to the songs from my CDs and just thinking... I think I was convicted to apologize to a friend of mine, because I was pretty annoyed at them on Thursday... I haven't done it yet, and I'm pretty scared of doing it. I think another reason why I don't want to do it, is that he doesn't even know that I was ticked at him, although I did sorta dismiss one of his problems with one of my own in a very "I-DON'T-GIVE-A-FLYING-RAT's-ARSE" attitude. I'm not sure if he got that vibe from me, and even if he did, I think I might've tried to sound more caring after I heard myself totally ignore his problem and shove mine into his head.... Rawr. My "problem" isn't even a problem anymore. It like something Nathan said from the MedEntry lectures or something.... "If something is always on sale, its never on sale." Although I did basically shoot that statement down, I must say it does hold some truth. If you can relate that to what I said previously, I congratulate you.

ANOTHER thing that has been bothering me... slightly. Is my Columbia application... I haven't got word back, but I checked the website and the chemistry class is closed, which means its full, which means I didn't get in. BUT! I still have a chance of getting into the linguistics or arts one... AHH. I'm so nervous, I've been checking my mail every day, just hoping to see the e-mail. Everyone else has got word back, and they all got in (to one extent or another), so I'm just waiting for mine... *sigh* The pressure...

Now, I really should sleep, its 12:30 at night and I gotta get up for VCE Expo tomorrow... Yay...

And sorry if this post felt like a bitch, because it wasn't supposed to be, and if it is... I might as well delete this blog D= I stopped blogging on my Xanga, 'cause all I would do is bitch. So yeah. =\

G'niight.

-jmah-